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Entries Tagged as 'Humor of the Day'

Funniest Doctor’s Appointment Ever!

July 30th, 2009 · 1 Comment

She’s trying to figure me out, see where to send me next. Debating between Endocrine and Neurology. Finally she says Endocrine first, “because they have more curable diseases.”
We talk for a couple minutes more, then she says she will have U of M call me with the appt. I verify, “Okay, Endocrine, right?”
She says, “No. [...]

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Tags: Health and Medicine · Humor of the Day

Whoops!

July 9th, 2009 · 1 Comment

Leaving Mass this morning, Fr. Anonymous was trying to wish me a good day.
Fr. A: “Hope you have a good day! We just received Jesus, so . . . . Oh . . . . I guess that means it’s all downhill from here.”
LOL! :)

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Tags: Humor of the Day · Tales of my Amazing Priests

Thursday Humor

June 11th, 2009 · 2 Comments

(Thanks to Michael for sharing!)
Recently, a large corporation hired several cannibals to increase their diversity, “You are all part of our team now,” said the Human Resources Rep. during the welcoming briefing. “You get all the usual benefits and you can go to the cafeteria for something to eat, but please don’t eat any [...]

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Tags: Humor of the Day · Neat Things I Didn't Author

Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

June 8th, 2009 · 3 Comments

Thanks to Ironic Catholic and The Curt Jester for today’s Humor of the Day! :)
Teilhard de Chardin:
The chicken was pursuing a teleological upsurge toward final consumation in the Omega Point of Divine Love.
Flannery O’Connor:
The chicken was struck by a truck while crossing the road, but experienced a flash of grace in the instant of [...]

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Tags: Humor of the Day · Neat Things I Didn't Author

Tip to avoid getting the Swine Flu

May 1st, 2009 · No Comments

Don’t do this:

Thanks to Cara for this important Public Service Announcement! :)

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Tags: Humor of the Day · Photography

When Venti is Just Too Small…

April 15th, 2009 · No Comments

I thought this was hilarious! Biggby coffee already has as their largest size a 24 oz, which is 4 oz larger than a Starbucks Venti (my usual size). But then, I was randomly looking at Biggby Bob’s blog and found THIS!
Check it out, you will laugh too! Happy Wednesday!
Says something about us, [...]

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Tags: Humor of the Day · Jennspeak · Pop Culture

10 Second Humor of the Day

April 3rd, 2009 · No Comments

Co-worker Kathy gets off the phone and her face is bright red. We ask why. “I said ‘Amen!’ instead of ‘Goodbye!’,” she says. Then, she looks at me, “This is all your influence!!! You need to tell your priests what you are doing to me!”
I will take the credit/blame.

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Tags: Humor of the Day

Why God Made Moms

March 11th, 2009 · 1 Comment

Answers given by 2nd grade school children to the following questions:
Why did God make mothers?
1. She’s the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of [...]

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Tags: Humor of the Day

I Have a Strange Sense of Humor

February 22nd, 2009 · 2 Comments

For example, take the books I picked up from the library today:
“Son of a Witch” by Gregory Maguire
“Chicken Soup for the Soul: Living Catholic Faith: 101 Stories to Offer Hope, Deepen Faith, and Spread Love” by Jack Canfield, Mark Victor Hansen & LeAnn Thieman
“He’s Just Not That Into You” by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo
“Sex [...]

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Tags: Humor of the Day · Jennspeak · Neat Things I Didn't Author

Reasons to Go to Breakfast in the Morning

February 17th, 2009 · No Comments

I’m standing in line in the hospital caf this morning, for my once-a-paycheck omelet. Bryan the Omelet Boy sees me in line, points and says (loudly) to the crowd, “I love her! If I didn’t already have a girlfriend, she’d be it!” :)
Certainly brightens the day…. :)

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Tags: Humor of the Day